Audience of bikers? Better play to the crowd

The Hell's Angels were in town last week. Overall, they were pretty uninteresting as customers as none of them were active dance or VIP buyers. 90% of them hung out, drank and socialized with each other in the bar. Of the remaining 10%, 9% were decent stage tippers, and 1% were actively annoying.

That 1% is represented in the above article -- literally. Wearing the same plaid shorts in the photo that he had on Friday night, this dude was the single most annoying customer in the bar all weekend. He was bouncing off the walls, hanging off a the railing that separates the stageside pit seating from the elevated seating area, and at one point actually attempted to walk on to the stage while a dancer was at the front, blissfully unaware of his brief presence. I feel for the band he forcibly sat in with; I mean, they didn't have bouncers or anything.

Black Velvet Beauty

Some of the best strip club art I've ever seen. New batch of photos up on Flickr today.

Gorgeous corsets

I am so pleased that the woman who made me this gorgeous corset finally has her retail site up and running. I love Lisa's corsets because she's willing to combine work of an extremely high quality with the considerations of performers (zippers for easy on-and-off being the main feature I appreciate). Waisted Couture -- go check it out, and tell her Susan sent you.

"I'm gonna get a Chardonnay right now."
"Well, I'm gonna get a big double shot, since we can only have one drink an hour. I only have three or four a night, though."
"I tried that, but I'll drink a double and only stay buzzed for 20 minutes! But if I have a wine or beer I can sip it for an hour and stay buzzed. If I have a double, like, 15 minutes later, or if I go on stage, I'm sober again."

"My customer is bringing in this hormone stuff that makes your boobs bigger! I'm so happy, I'll get bigger boobs without a boob job."
"Wow, that must be why no one ever gets boob jobs anymore."
"They don't?"

"Ugh, I'm so sweaty. I think they like it when we smell a little, though."
"Oh, yeah. You won't believe this, but one of the best nights I ever had was after I'd been hunting and butchered a mule deer and didn't have time to shower before work. This one guy couldn't get enough of me, he bought 17 dances and four VIPs."

Happy Birthday to Grace

Grace Undressed, happy 28th. 28 is when I got married, and you are already paired, and you have 364 more days to be 28, so you may be officially mated yet and not violate Vulcan tradition.

And thanks for bestowing the Arte y pico award (whatever that may be -- an excuse to spread blog love around, I assume, since it didn't come with a Lush gift certificate or anything) on me, with such kind words.

I suppose I need to turn around and pass it on to five other blogs I love. Damn you for snagging Sadie and Tara, but I've shared a stage with them, so phbbbt.

Todd is a D2 customer who shockingly showed me that customers, too, can be amazed at the nonsensical behavior of strip club management. His sardonic wit and clear-eyed commentary make him a jewel in that tiniest of categories, the strip club customer blog.

Avalon almost makes me want to read self-help tomes. While I'm amused at the thought of her trying to whip some of the basket cases I've worked with into SuperStripper material, reading her blog on my phone at work has turned around more than one bad night. She's also a one-woman stereotype-combating machine.

Everything Jo Weldon does is covered in glitter and feathers, metaphorically speaking.

Quixotic Dancer not only picked a fabulous blog name, but has some great musings on men, notably this great post about cunnilingus and male self-delusion.

Davka has been on my radar for a while; I like to read about the places I've been through another perspective.

Enough of that, then. I want my next award to come with a free lapdance, or a sandwich or something.

where I was

Sunday was quiet for a while, quiet enough for me to amuse myself taking snapshots of the bar and then myself.








flickr to be updated when I'm not in an airport

In Alaska. It rained almost all week. My travel partner's disposition has been poor due to factors outside my control. I covered my expenses and made a tidy profit; I am tired and stressed, but I am so glad I came. I would have been sad to miss my annual trip to stripper summer camp.